The Mystery Date

“My friend wants to know when you’re going to call her.”

Normally that would be a very simple request. A friend had wanted to set me up with one of her friends from out of town. In other words, a blind date. Yeah, I can hear you laughing, but this level of desperation is pretty typical for single parents. Well, for me anyway.

But in this case there was a reason I hadn’t called. You see, there was one itsy-bitsy problem:

I didn’t know her friend’s phone number.

And, even worse, I didn’t even know her name.

I’m sure you could see where both could be a problem.

I’ve had dates where I didn’t know the woman’s name. Dates where I wished I hadn’t known her name. And dates who probably forgot my name by the next day.

But this was a first.

You’re probably wondering why even bother. Well, beyond the desperation factor (especially for the geekily enhanced, like me) there is the tantalizing possibility that this one could be THE ONE. It’s kind of like the allure of gambling or even the Publisher’s Clearing House: YOU could be the winner!

And if you’ve been through this dating process for a second (or third. Or more . . . ) time, then you know that anyone you haven’t dated is probably the PERFECT woman (or man, depending on which direction you’re going). And what you’ve also probably discovered is that EVERYONE is the perfect date . . . before you date them.

And therein lies the hook.

Yep, they’re ALL perfect . . . until the reality of the date sets in. And then you find out that they may not be quite as perfect as you had thought. Or even worse, they find out that I’m not as perfect as they imagined. ( I would have thought that the picture they saw of my wearing either my MST 3000 or Monty Python t-shirt might have clued them in already, but you know what they say about hope.)

For instance, I recently had a woman tell me I was stupid. This actually occurred during the date, after my taste in movies and music had already been ridiculed. I offered to take an online IQ test to show that, in fact, I probably wasn’t as stupid as many men she had dated. But by then she had already finished dinner and the mood was pretty much ruined.

So here I am again, on the verge of dating the perfect woman . . . if only I knew her name.

You might see a personal ad in your local paper that reads something like this: “Are you her? If you’re the perfect woman I was about to go out with, please contact me right away!!”

Yep, I knew my marketing skills would come in handy one day. Now, all I have to do is sit back and wait for the phone to start ringing . . .