I like books. And on the rare occasions when I’ve read my comic book until their memorized and all of my coloring books are complete, I break out something more serious. Such was the case recently when I happened upon the biography of Elon Musk. I didn’t know much about Musk, and I thought (while…
Tag: humor
Author still awaiting elusive growth spurt
I’ve been waiting. For a long time. I used to think it was a long wait for Christmas . . . at 5 p.m. on Christmas Eve. But this? THIS? This is like waiting for the mail in hell for a package that’s continually taken to the wrong address. And without enough postage. And when…
Common profanity could be blessing in disguise
I’m a very literal person. I should get that out of the way first. Sometimes too literal. So maybe that’s why I’ve always questioned one of the most common bits of profanity in the English language. You know the one. It’s the Biggie. The one that permeates every nook and cranny of society. So there…
Dog’s Unusual Name Causes Confusion
In honor of my aunt Shirley who passed away last week, I’m re-posting one of my most popular blog posts. I hope you enjoy. Several years ago, my wife, daughter, and I lived in a small town next to a church, where I served as the youth director. One day, we found a beautiful border…
The Kool-Aid Kid
My kids love Kool-Aid. Let me rephrase that. I WISH my kids love Kool-Aid. Oh sure, they’ll drink it from time to time. But my kids, being typical kids, want all those bad drinks. Stuff like, water. Or maybe milk. And oftentimes they want a . . . are you ready for this . .…
Living with Satan’s cat
As parents, we do a lot of things for our kids: we take them to soccer and sports practices, listen as they practice their musical instruments, arrange sleepovers, and cook them their favorite meals. Of course, sometimes we have to do things we’d really prefer not to. Like sitting up with them in the middle…
The Way a Dating Profile SHOULD be Written
I recently thought about trying my luck with online dating. If you’re not familiar with online dating, it’s basically technology’s way of taking the horror and humiliation of regular dating and multiplying it by a number that’s larger than my annual salary. So first I need a profile picture. That’s easy enough – there are plenty…
The tragic tale of Billy the Biscuit
(For this blog post, you’ll need to read it with a southern, somewhat jovial accent. Imagine if you were listening to Mark Twain spin a yarn, or that dude who used to narrate “Dukes of Hazzard. Oh, and you’ll need to pretend he’s strumming a banjo a little while he’s talking. You know, for effect…
Son ponders what The Future will look like
It started with a question. But then that’s how most things start around our house. “Dad, what do you think the world will be like when I’m an adult?” I was in the midst of “cooking” breakfast (is it really cooking when you just add milk? I’ll have to get my research team on that…
The Girlfriend Handbook, Part 2 – 10 first date questions answered!
(It’s probably best if you read this first sentence with a very smooth, sexy voice. Think Barry White. Or even me – that is if you can imagine me having a sexy voice.) All right, ladies. Here’s what you’ve been waiting for. The second installment of my Girlfriend Handbook. If you’re a regular reader, then…
Holding together the jello 